At this moment, I am extremely bored. Kevin's at work, there's no one on Facebook, I don't want to clean, and I don't feel like watching tv.
I had some random thoughts on my mind so I figured I'd bust out a blog entry.
1) Children? Meh.
As a female, I am basically completely devoid of an interest in having children. Sure, they are cute; especially in cute little outfits. They are cute when they laugh, squeak, smile, etc. However, when I think of having children, all I think of is the hassle that comes with having one. Constantly having to be responsible for something that poops and pukes, never being able to leave it at home when you want to go somewhere, basically providing for it and obsessing about taking care of it 24/7 for 18+ years. Really? No thanks. Sure, my opinion could change. But I feel like by the age of 25 you would know and should know whether you want to have kids in the future. Why am I SO weird?
2) I am damn lazy.
I seriously want to reprogram myself. I'm pretty sure I have been a lazy individual since the moment I was born. I come home everyday from work and outside of maybe cooking dinner and walking Bailey in evenings, I do nothing. I come in the house, say hello to Bailey, and turn on the Brain Melter, also known as the TV. I can't wait to watch episodes of reality TV like 'The Rachel Zoe Project' and 'The Real Housewives of Atlanta'. I am more interested in the lives these people lead than my own, because my life is so unbelievably boring. For the most part, I realize this is my fault. I can blame some of my boredom on my lack of funds to do anything that interesting but for the most part, it's my own doing. I don't think of new things, I don't go any where, I don't take up any hobbies. Hell, I can't even get myself to finish the Twilight series because reading makes me fall asleep. In addition to all this...I'm a little round around the midsection but do you think I would go to the gym I belong to or work out at home? Of course not. If I did, I wouldn't be lazy.
3) Photography.
I want to be really good at taking pictures. Beautiful, artistic pictures. Landscapes, flowers, people, animals, etc. It's funny...I go to get togethers with people or go to a Tigers game, or whatever the case may be and rarely do I even take my camera. Worse than that, when I do take my camera, I don't take any pictures. Yet somehow, I want to be good at photography. Ha.
I don't know anything about anything, I don't do anything. Sweeeeet. How do I change that?
And saying, 'Just change and do something' is way easier said than done. For a very long time, I haven't truly liked myself. And I don't know how to make that not be the case.
*While this blog post sounds like I'm in a depressed state. I'm not. I'm simply making some observations about myself. No worries, y'all.
1 comment:
when i was a little girl i wanted to be a marine biologist (so i could be a dolphin trainer at seaworld), a mountain man, and a mommy. well the seaworld and mountain man things didnt really pan out, but i am a mommy. it is undescribable. the good and bad. i guess what im trying to explain is that even though my dream came true, its really not at all how i imagined it. the negative aspects are much worse than i could ever imagine, but the good? it is better than i could ever explain. but it is not at all how i thaught it would be.
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